I made a mistake in one of my previous columns. I stated that when you see someone, even a complete stranger, and they’re laughing, or look as though they’re having a good time, don’t think that maybe it’s an act and that, in private, they may have problems they’re dealing with.
 
I admit it, I was wrong and I am wrong. I’ve come to realise that these assumptions are in people’s minds because they’ve been planted there by life coaches, motivational speakers, movies, books of stupid quotes by famous people and stupid dramas. Words such as these are written to sell books and for business to get paid for their services. It’s also said by people who do not really have an adequate response to the real and gut wrenching emotions you probably cannot help display in front of them.
 
I have been out and about a great deal in the past five years observing people’s behaviour, not just towards their own families but towards complete strangers as well. I’ve seen them laugh together and I’ve seen them smile at each other; I’ve seen them have pleasant conversations and generally have a good time. I can assure you from what I have observed that none, none of these behaviours is contrived or designed to conceal a deep, dark hidden emotion. They are real signs of people being happy and enjoying life.
 
It’s possible that their lives are very basic but, for the majority of people, that is enough to keep them happy and to enjoy every minute they have. I also said in that same previous column that there is a section of people, one of many, who have little in life but are content with what they have; they don’t fret about the past, the present or the future. I now believe, from my multiple observations of numerous individuals, hundreds of couples and families in fact, that most, if not all, fall into this category. In my numerous observations, I have seen many smiles and heard many a laughter from people having fun but I have never ever seen anyone looking upset, sad or crying, except perhaps for myself.
 
From experience I can tell you that if someone is sad or upset or distressed, there is not a chance in the universe they will truly be able to conceal it with some fake laughter or fake smile. Moreover, even if they manage an excruciatingly difficult smile, the rest of their body language, including the look in their eyes, will tell you the real anguish they’re experiencing on a day to day basis.
 
Life is good is something I do not want to hear because it simply isn’t true. It is another mantra touted by advertising departments to sell their wares. For a few people life is anything but good, no matter how much or how little they might have in life. But I would like to emphasise that these are in the minority and the really distressing problems they are going through should not be taken lightly or diminished by some well-known saying that everyone has problems but they show it differently.
 
However, just so that people don’t jump down my throat, I will add one small disclaimer but that disclaimer is for the odd isolated incidences. Once in a blue moon, and it is a blue moon, one in a while you might come across someone who looks at peace and smiles with a pleasant greeting whenever he sees you. You might think, look how happy he is, but maybe he’s not. Maybe something bad happened to him, or his loved one, that can never be erased from his memory. He is one person who is hiding his grief or anguish or pain behind a smile. But I will emphasise that he is an exception, not the rule.
 
There is a saying, ‘Laugh and the whole world laughs with you; cry and you cry alone’. This is one saying that is actually one hundred per cent true. I’ve seen groups of people in food courts having a party and every now and again there would be a burst of laughter. The people in the vicinity of the table look in their direction and start laughing as well.
 
On the other hand, if you ever find yourself crying in public, I can assure you with the same one hundred per cent certainty that no one will notice or care or even look in your direction. The world is a horrible place to be in and it’s best to get out of it soon.